Watching Our Pups Age

It’s usually just before lights out, and right before I get into my own bed, that I lay down with Kloe for our night time ritual of cuddles and whispers of sweet nothings. She lays curled up on her mat looking aristocratic and regal. My eyes are fixed on her and she stares back at me with her big and loving chestnut eyes. There is no denying that at eight years old Kloe is entering her senior years. As I approach I call her “Queenie” and our brief ritual begins. Although at times Kloe still exhibits puppy-like behavior, true to her breed, her face is seasoned and peppered with a greying muzzle.

Kloe is our only Golden Retriever that we adopted as a true straight from the litter puppy. Bailey, our first Golden, was 18 months when we rescued him years ago as a birthday present for our son. Kali was approximately five when she flew from Taiwan into our lives and hearts. Koda, although still a puppy, was four months when she stormed into our pack.

Kloe was just nine weeks. She was from a litter of three other females. I can remember meeting all three puppies and noticing Kloe’s calm demeanor and a pouty face. I loved the pouty face!… Fast forward and now at lights out, as I lay next to my eight year old Queenie, I see the same pouty face that I saw in that seven week old puppy. It makes me happy that I can still see the puppy in her face. Although I’m glad that in some ways we are growing “older” together, the reality is that Kloe will very pass before I do if we are both fortunate enough to live our full life’s expectancy.

So how old is Kloe in human years?

There are various ways to calculate your dog’s age. The most common method, although not accurate, is seven years for every human year. In Dr. Karen Shaw Becker’s book The Forever Dog she references a 2019 study by researchers at the University of California, San Diego. In their research they found that most dogs follow a similar developmental trajectory reaching puberty at ten months and dying before age twenty. The research team created a new way to measure aging in dogs which, as Dr. Becker says, is a “bit more complex than multiplying by seven”. This formula, the researchers say, applies to dogs older than one. In other words once the dog turns one the math works. The formula is 16 x ln (where ln is the dog’s age) +31. To work out your dog’s “human” age, first enter the dog’s age then press ln on a scientific calculator. Then multiply the figure you get by 16, and finally add 31.

When I do this for Kloe’s age which is eight, the result is 64.3

More dog and less science…

One recent evening during our lights out ritual and as Kloe and I were nose to nose, I realized something I had not thought of before. It dawned on me that with our pups we often see them go from wee little puppy, to adolescent, to adulthood, to senior, to end-of-life. We watch them go through their entire life spanning stages and years. I won’t see this with my human children. Of course I would not want to. No child should pass before their parent. But with our pups, at least for me, it’s different.

Kloe is healthy, runs like a gazelle with her muscular physique on full display, and can chase down and catch a ball like a major league center fielder. Over the coming years I’ll see her continue to age. I’ll see her greying muzzle day-by day turn into a classic “clown face” (I wish there was a better term for that). She’ll begin to slow and eventually the slow will turn to stop. When that time comes I will consider it a blessing and an honor to have been there with my sweet Kloe for the entire and full run of a dog’s life.

Forget the science. Forget the formulaic manner in which to measure arbitrary milestones. One month, one year, one day? How about one life?

And It all began with a pouty face.

2016: Kloe 9 weeks old and first day home

Kloe is Eight! No way…

Right side of my brain: “Kloe is eight”.

Left side of my brain: “No way!!”

Right side of my brain: “Yes way! Look it up…”

Wow!

I didn’t have to look it up. It’s true. My puppy, my baby, my sweet sweet Kloe who I now sometimes refer to as Queenie Kweenie, turned eight today.

Left side of my brain: “How the heck did that happen?”

Right side of my brain: “She was born and then the earth circled the sun eight times”.

Left side of my brain: “Shut up Mr. Logical!”

In my heart Kloe is still the nine week old puppy we brought home all those years ago and introduced to Golden Kali who quickly became her “Sissy-Mama”, mentor, and best friend! Kloe helped shape our pack and continues to bring us great joy and happiness. She is our guardian, our protector, and the heart and soul of The Golden K.

Right side of my brain: “But you do know it’s been eight years, right?

Left side of my brain: “Yep! Eight years of love, devotion, and joy!”

Right side of my brain: “I agree. Happy Birthday Kloe!”

Kloe Through The Years

Sorry Kloe!

Kloe could have never hung out with the Seven Dwarfs. Mainly because of Sneezy. 

Sneezy is one of the seven dwarfs in Disney’s 1937 animated feature film Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs. As a result of severe hay fever or cold seasons, Sneezy is prone to eruptive, unpredictable, and uncontrollable bouts of sneezing, hence his name.

From the Fandom Disney Wiki, https://disney.fandom.com/wiki/The_Disney_Wiki

Eruptive, unpredictable, and uncontrollable bouts of sneezing do not go over very well with Kloe! When Kloe hears a sneeze she will stop whatever she’s doing, or isn’t doing as the case may be, and run to my side and lean her entire 80 pound body into me all the while staring with her beautiful chestnut colored eyes into mine. But honestly, after 8 years I am still not 100 percent certain if she is there to save me or for me to protect her.

When Kloe was a puppy there was a time when we used a “Pet Protector” to discourage certain behaviors. You know, like not cleaning her room, skipping out on her chores around the house, and not getting homework done on time. Just (obviously) kidding… Unwanted behaviors like jumping up on visitors, digging where she shouldn’t be, etc. The Pet Corrector lets out a loud hissing sound from compressed air in a can. It always got Kloe’s attention and she would immediately cease the unwanted behavior and come running to Holly’s or my side with fear in her eyes. Although the Pet Corrector stopped the unwanted behavior it also scared the poop (not literally) out of Kloe so we didn’t use it very long. I want my pups to behave but not out of fear for their lives!

A sneeze sounds a lot like the Pet Corrector. So for the longest time we thought Kloe was having Pet Corrector flashbacks whenever someone sneezed.

Kloe is a highly sensitive dog. She senses when people are sad or not feeling well. At those times she will go to that person, lean her body into them, and gaze at them with loving, caring, and her aforementioned beautiful chestnut colored eyes.”Feel better, get better”, she seems to plead. We began thinking that Kloe interpreted the sneeze as a sign of illness or distress for the “sneezer” and took it upon herself to care for that person.

But that theory didn’t last very long. We soon realized that if Holly sneezed Kloe would come running to me. Holly would say, “Thanks Kloe; I’m the one in distress but you’re worried about Dad?!” So more recently we are back to thinking that sneezes just scare Kloe whether because of the Pet Corrector days or just because she’s a sissy wimp. 🙂

So these days whenever one of us sneezes we’ll say “sorry Kloe” as she comes running to our side. I even go so far as to run into another room when I feel a sneeze coming on so Kloe won’t hear it. The things we do for our pups, right? Our friends have even become acutely aware that if they sneeze Kloe will react. They too will say, “Sorry Kloe”.

But here is the kicker. Kloe understands the word “sneeze”. If I feel a sneeze coming on – and don’t think I can make it to another room or closet to sneeze – I’ll say, “Sorry Kloe, I think I am going to sneeze.” Kloe will immediately come to my side as if I had already sneezed. 

Moral of the story: If you are within earshot of Kloe, avoid Eruptive, unpredictable, and uncontrollable bouts of sneezing at all costs !

Another Year Without Kali

New Years Day. A clean slate. A countdown to the next one in 365 days (or 366 as the case in 2024 which is a Leap Year). For the past two years, January 1st marks another year passed since my precious Golden Kali crossed the bridge. 

But it’s not a sad day. Although I miss Kali desperately I don’t mourn her passing. I suppose that’s because we had many healthy and happy years together. And, in the end she passed on our collective terms with dignity, grace and in the comfort of our home, The Golden K, which was named for her. 

This is the second New Years day without Kali. After two years I feel no less connected to Kali than the day I held her head in my lap as she passed. It’s comforting to me knowing that although she is no longer in the flesh she continues to live vividly in my heart. I can still smell her. I can still feel her soft coat and hear her gentle breathing as she slept by my side and on my feet. In my minds eye I can see the subtle nuance of her gentle personality as she moved about her day which was mostly by my side. I feel her with me now.

There is not a day that I don’t think about Kali. She still “visits” me in my dreams where we hug as we did so often in flesh and blood. In so many ways it’s still just me and Kali. A guy and his dog walking the trail, taking in the early morning sites and smells, sitting and looking off into the distance at nothing in particular. And of course Kali prancing as I prepared her meals.

My forever heart dog!

Happy New Year Kali. Continue to always run free sweetie girl. You will always be omnipresent in my heart, my thoughts, and my life. 

The Sigh….

At night Kloe and Koda sleep on their mats next to our bed. Kloe usually on Holly’s side and Koda on mine. In the middle of the night, if I’m awake, I listen to their breathing. It’s peaceful and calming to me to hear my girls breathing in cadence as they lay sleeping peacefully and oblivious to any worries or stress.

Even better is “The Sigh”.

Often times, in the dark of night, I will hear Koda stand up and conduct a routine that her species has done for thousands of years: nesting!

From Google in reference to a dogs behavior as they prepare to nest: Dogs in the wild slept on grass, leaves, and various other natural substrates. In order to create a comfortable bed, dogs would scratch and trample down the area with their feet and paws, flattening spiky vegetation and removing rocks and sticks, to create a comfortable bed. This is called nesting, and it likely wasn’t only about comfort. 

And that describes Koda: scratching her mat with her paws, sometimes for as long as 15 or 20 seconds. She then circles a few times, and lies down. As she lies down, there is a long and audible sigh. She is quickly fast asleep and her world, and mine in that moment, are peaceful and calm.

Bedtime Preparation

Being creatures of habit The Red Girls and I have many rituals and routines. Morning, mid-day, dinner time and bedtime. There are steps, dialogue and processes carried out in much the same way each time. One of those is bedtime preparation.

Bedtime preparation includes letting the girls outside to pee. There is more to this than just the action of peeing… Kloe is usually first out. As soon as she hears the door open she’s on her feet heading out for her nightly patrol of the property in order to”secure the perimeter”. Kloe is the protector of the Golden K and Koda, Holly, and I are lucky enough to be part of her pack. Some nights I have to go back out and look for her usually finding her perched high on the deck performing sentry duties. She’ll reluctantly follow me back in even though she’d prefer to stay on duty.

Koda usually needs some “encouragement” to go out. Typically she’s fast asleep with no interest in peeing or doing anything other than to stay where’s she’s at to slumber the night away. I call to her, “C’mon Koda, get busy!” Get busy is our term for “go pee”. “Come on, Koda. Time for bed. Get up. Go out and get busy”. Usually nothing changes. I try another tact, “Your sissy is outside patrolling. She may need some back up if she finds any intruders”. Koda asleep with thought bubble over her head: “Zzzzzz”. I walk to her and nudge her with my foot. She immediately rolls on her back in a prone position with all legs in the air. I stick my foot under her back; she pretends not to notice. Finally, she will pop up and comply. I’m not a fan of this part of the bedtime prep! And Koda is probably not either.

The girls eventually arrive back at one of the doors and ask to come in (unless I have to go get Kloe). They then retire to their mats set out next to our bed, or if hot, a cool spot on the laminate floor. 

As they come in, and in an effort to discourage any lallygagging, I proclaim, “First come first serve. Sometimes just to mess with them I’ll say, “Last come last serve.” My humor is usually lost on them…

Cuddle Time

First come first serve refers to the first one on their mat gets to cuddle with me first. Cuddling usually involves me down on the floor next to them. I’ll pet them softly, hug them with my whole body, and whisper secrets and sweet nothing in their ears. Kloe, wide eyed, stares deeply into my eyes sometimes emitting small grunts to tell me she loves me too. Koda’s squirms a bit and tries to lick my face. In both cases both of them are usually content and glad to be left alone to go to sleep.

In her later years Kali would typically lay in the middle of the room, whether hot or cold, with plenty of space around her.

So now get ready for full disclosure….. Kali and I would spoon.

Me on the outside with her back pushed up against my chest. My arms and sometimes a leg would complete the spooning position and we’d lay there. I warned you – full disclosure! :). Sometimes we’d lay there quietly just breathing, usually in unison. Other times we talked softly to one another. Kali was a great listener!  Occasionally I would fall asleep and wake up minutes later or longer, with a smile as I headed to my own bed.

Thinking of this the other day it hit me!

When I lay and cuddle with Kloe and Koda it’s for them. I’m protecting them, my babies. Of course I take great pleasure out of this 1:1 time, but my intentions are for them. To make them feel loved, safe, and protected. With Kali, our cuddle time was for me! Cuddling and spooning with Kali made me feel safe. It made me feel secure. My entire body would relax. If there was any stress in my day it would all seem to dissipate at once. Although I know Kali enjoyed our special time together I now realize that it was her giving to me. Not the other way around. What a gift! Who rescued who, right?

Even though Kali’s been gone for over a year and a half I continue to learn from her. I know our relationship before she crossed the bridge and now is not unique. But, my Golden Kali was about the most special gift one could ever hope for!

Kali in her later years

A Great Big Deal

Koda had dental surgery recently. She had a couple of cracked molars that had to be extracted. She’s doing fine and aside from learning how to navigate chewing with less teeth she is back to her regular feisty self.

Koda would be under general anesthesia for the procedure so she couldn’t eat after 8:00 the evening before. No big deal. We are mostly early risers up and about by 6:30 am or so. My normal routine with the girls is to let them outside to take care of “business” and then return inside for breakfast. This means that they are usually eating by around 7:00 am or so.

But on this particular morning of Koda’s surgery she couldn’t eat and she wasn’t due to the vet until 8:30. We decided that Holly would feed Kloe once I left with Koda. No big deal.

And it wasn’t. A big deal that is… When the girls came inside from taking care of business I was at the kitchen table with my cup of coffee and iPad reading and they each laid down next to me and mostly went back to sleep. And then it hit me. If Kali were still with us it would have been a GREAT BIG DEAL!

Kali was an incredibly flexible and easy going dog. She went with flow. She readily adapted to life in America as a five year old rescue from Taiwan. She didn’t miss a beat when we added another puppy (Kloe) to the pack. And then within a few weeks later we moved to the mountains. No big deal for Kali!

When no big deal is A BIG DEAL

But meals for Kali were A BIG DEAL! Until the day she crossed The Bridge meal time was A BIG DEAL. To get an idea of how big a deal it was think of Snoopy from the iconic Charles Shultz creation “Peanuts” singing and dancing to the song “Suppertime“.

Dinner time for the girls is usually around 6:00 pm.

When Kali was with us dinner time was always at 6:00 pm. Also being a creature of habit and routine I was usually sitting in my recliner watching the evening news by 5:00. By 5:15 or so Kali would position herself somewhere between me and the cupboard where her food was stored. She’d lay there looking at me with her eyes laser locked on me. She seemed to use every ounce of her Golden subliminal powers to make me rise from my chair, move to the cupboard, and feed her. She didn’t flinch or seem to move a muscle the entire time. I could feel the heat of her laser locked eyes on my neck but I was always resolved to finish watching the news. On occasion I would dare to look her way and make light of the situation. “I see you Kal” I’d say. “It’s getting close but you know, if you could tell time you’d see it’s not quite six o’clock yet. [chuckle] If you had opposable thumbs you could fix your own dinner. [guffaw] C’mon you can do this. Trust me. I have faith in you.” In spite of my chuckles and occasional guffaws Kali found none of this funny. She would remain motionless and maintain her laser locked stare on my jugular. The only thing that seemed to change was the intensity of the laser energy she was preparing to launch my way in order to get my butt out of my chair. But Kali was smart. She also knew that if the laser was too intense it could knock me out or worse. Then she’d really be up a creek without a food bowl! So she would then ratchet the power down to stun…

Six O’clock would eventually arrive and I would announce: “The time has come!” This proclamation would break the trance Kali had worked herself into. She would stand and begin her dance; the twirls, the head nods, and the tap tap taping of her nails on the kitchen floor. (See Suppertime above)

This is how meal time was with Kali. Breakfast wasn’t much different except the wait time was shorter but the expectations just as high.

So on the morning of Koda’s procedure, as I sat there with my coffee and the two unfed Red Girls by my side, I thought of Kali. My sweet princess. My “heart dog”. My easy-going, take-it-how-it-comes-girl. My whatever-works-for-you-works-for-me-sweet-angel.

And I chuckled and thought to myself: If Kali was here this would be A GREAT BIG DEAL!

Kali: ready to fire a warning shot towards me with with her specially fitted laser glasses

IQ versus EQ

A lot has been written about IQ – “intelligence quotient” and EQ – “emotional quotient”. A quick Google search and review of various website definitions boils down to this:

IQ tests measure your ability to solve problems, use logic, and grasp or communicate complex ideas. EQ tests measure your ability to recognize emotion in yourself and others, and to use that awareness to guide your decisions

https://www.healthline.com/health/eq-vs-iq#bottom-line

This is of course referencing IQ and EQ for humans. But what about dogs? Do dogs have a similar set of measurements. Can IQ and EQ be applied to dogs when assessing their strengths and tendencies? I think they do. This is not a scientific blog. It’s a blog about dogs. So I am not going to try to corroborate my opinion with anything other than my experiences with my own dogs.

I’ll start with Koda, my five year old. I believe she has a very high iQ. She is the most intelligent dog I’ve had. She is good at problem solving, she is an effective verbal communicator, and attentively listens for direction understanding the words I say and actions I ask her take. I can see it in her eyes when I speak to her. She processes the information and in parallel formulates a response. If she disagrees she lets me know.

Kloe’s strength is her EQ. My non-expert opinion is that Kloe would have made a very good service dog. We considered that for a time when she was younger but for various reasons never pursued it. Kloe can read the room and know when someone is upset or not feeling well. She will gravitate to that person, if she is able, and sit next to them and lean in or lay at their feet. When a visitor comes to the house Kloe is instantly in love. With a wildly wagging tail, she attempts to sit at our visitor’s side as they enter our home. She groans in pleasure and stares up a their eyes. And all the while Koda is jumping and barking (much to our chagrin) as she competes with Kloe for our visitor’s attention. We scold Koda and say, “Down!” Kloe immediately goes to a down position in an attempt to defuse the craziness situation.

I know these are very common behaviors and tendencies with most dogs. My point is that in my girls I see similar distinctions as it relates to IQ versus EQ.

All this is not say that Koda doesn’t have compassion or that Kloe is dumb. Not in the least. If Kloe senses a threat – real or otherwise – to one of us or our property she goes into protect mode as the Guardian Of The Golden K. Kloe will begin barking and patrolling. Koda often will try to see what Kloe sees (sometimes nothing) and look back at me as if to say, “Dad, I don’t see anything. Tell me what to do”.

Kloe feels. Koda thinks.

Maybe this is what makes these two a good team. Long time followers of the Golden Kali blog may be thinking, “What about Kali? Where does she fall on the question of IQ versus EQ?

That’s fair and good question. As I’ve been writing this I have also asked myself that question. The same long time followers know my bias and how special Kali was, and remains, to me. So I will answer that question like this:

Kali transcends the question of IQ versus EQ. She thinks on a different level than most humans and canines. Kali played 4 dimensional chess in her sleep. Kali could levitate. Kali was a Jedi Master of Dogs and I was fortunate to be her Padawan ( A Jedi’s apprentice). Kali’s Midi-chlorian counts were the highest ever recorded in a dog. [Sorry – did I jump the shark with that last reference to Star Wars?]

Stick Art

It’s a good thing we live in the forest! Because Kloe loves chewing on sticks. With pines, oaks, and cedars all dropping their deadwood around the Golden K Kloe always has a wide variety of sticks to choose from.

When Kloe was a puppy I worried that she might swallow a big piece and choke. Or that the accumulation of stick particles would cause harm to her mouth or stomach. But she doesn’t really eat any of the stick. She gnaws on the larger sticks and shreds the smaller sticks. Kloe can take a moderate size stick – say a half inch to an inch round – and make toothpicks. With larger sizes she is like a wood carver. She’ll create various shapes – sometimes over a period of days with the same large stick – until the stick is small enough to then shred into toothpicks.

A variation of the stick chewing is when Kloe methodically dismantles a pine cone -scale by scale- placing the scales in a pile until the pine cone is reduced to what looks like a corn cob with all the corn off of it. If I try to pick up a pine cone with my bare hands I get stuck if not careful. So it always amazes me that Kloe can pick pine cones up with her mouth with no regard for the sharp needle-like ends of the scale.

Kloe takes her stick chewing pretty seriously. Her focus and intensity is a lot like the aforementioned wood carver carefully planning and then executing each stroke of the knife. Or in Kloe’s case, each chomp of her jaw. She demonstrates quite a bit of artistry with her sticks!

About a year ago I came upon Kloe in one of her favorite chewing spots and captured the photo below. Taken with my iPhone in portrait mode this shot highlights my sweet girl at work in her “studio” carving away with a large inventory of sticks nearby for future Stick Art projects.

The Very Special Scarf

It was 9:00 PM on Saturday May 24, 2014 when we rolled the large travel crate out of the arrival terminal at San Francisco International Airport. I had been waiting anxiously for this evening for almost two months. We rolled the crate into an elevator and found our way to the outdoor parking lot for a few last minute details before taking Kali home to Livermore. This was the beginning of a life changing event not only for me for me but also for Kali who had traveled all the way from Taiwan and into my arms. Her life became mine, and mine became hers. Neither of us would ever be the same! New readers can learn more about the origins of Golden Kali here.

As we were preparing to drive home to Livermore a volunteer from the local rescue group, True Love Rescue, placed a scarf around Kali’s neck. The scarf was red, white, and blue with patterns of stars and stripes. A fitting symbol for Kali now that she was an American Girl. The scarf became an immediate and special symbol of Kali’s journey, and of her emerging life in America.

That was Memorial weekend 2014. Kali wore the scarf for the rest of the weekend until I took it off and tied it onto her crate. She wore it again on Fourth of July and then it went into a drawer. Kali and I are big fans of tradition, Since that first Fourth Of July together, and for the past nine years, I only take the scarf out on Fourth of July for Kali to wear for the day.

Except Kali is not with us anymore. This is the second “4th” since Kali crossed the bridge. So like last year, and for hopefully many more years to come, her “little” sister Kloe will “carry the torch” and carry on the tradition of wearing the Very Special Scarf,. But only on the Fourth Of July.